November 11th - Perfect Last Days In India

Normally, when I'm close to leaving a place, my mind goes into accelerated forward planning mode: when will I pack, how long will it take, when am I scheduled to leave, what will I do my last day and when – almost down to 30 minute increments. Basically, way, way, way to much in the future in my head ... and I miss out on actually enjoying the time I have left in a place. This time however, about a week before leaving, I decided to just try and be and fully enjoy the last week – I had the taxi and train booked and by now, I pack quick, so really what else was there – so I continued on present in my lovely Rajpur life and haven't thought ahead – and it's been wonderful.

When it got down to my last two days – and I was surprised to realize it – I also decided to keep my routine 'normal' right to the end – I could have gone into town and done some gift shopping (sorry guys ...) or had a last meal out or seen a temple I hadn't yet visited but that wasn't the energy I wanted. I wanted to enjoy the peace and serenity of this quiet life for as long as humanly possible.

So the second to last day was a last class with Swati – a great class and the back bends had me feeling particularly alive after! Followed by breakfast at Amdo's – it was a larger group than normal – nice but almost a little forced – not as relaxed as it's been when it was a smaller number of regulars there catching up on the class and the day. A little internet time and then – to the roof! My favorite writing spot is the pergola on top of the yoga studio – it is like sitting on top of the flowers of the garden, surrounded by the hills and the most beautiful breeze wafts in. Then practice – I've found a practice while here – I go and depending on what else I've done that day, my mood, the right practice seems to come to me / flow. I still have a huge amount to explore and grow with it and I'm very happy to be at this point as I leave. Then Laura and I wandered down the main Rajpur road – we had some errands (sweets and samosas) and also a little shoe shopping to do (even in India I can find shoe shopping!) and had the most lovely (written just for her ...) time – she has this lovely light, bright energy and we laugh a lot. A final relaxed dinner with Gavin and Laura, some writing and bed – the back pack still in it's corner.

The last day and in some ways it doesn't feel like I'm leaving at all – in other ways, I'm good to go. We had a great class with Rajiv this morning – he was at his inspirational best – yoga is about finding the light within and I do glimpse it – a final shavasana like trikonasana that had us all in a very special place at the end. I then had a lovely treat – breakfast in one of the other houses – it was a beautiful spot with a quiet garden amongst fields with flowers and the hills. It turned into a few relaxed hours of good conversation in the sun – and as I realized it was my last day in the sun (I've been in the warm sun everyday since the beginning of May and next stop is London in November) I risked overstaying my welcome to soak it up - literally! A final practice – distracted with people coming and going to say goodbye – a final sync at the internet, a final samosa and chai and a lovely final dinner with Gavin and Laura – Laura and I had the giggles – and poor Gavin, looking at the two of us 'vatas' and our 'lightness' – he said it was like watching two helium balloons float off in the ether ... I've been incredibly lucky with housemates and I will miss the dinners!

I saw Gavin and Laura off, made a final cup of tea, sat and enjoyed the last of the candles, looking at the sky and was just grateful – very, very grateful. I had no idea coming what this experience would bring me and it just surpassed my expectations in all possible ways. I have this joy inside and a full heart – and now maybe, I'm just ridiculously blissed out on 7 weeks of yoga and pranyama (entirely possible) but it's more than that. I feel love. Love for everything – the sky, the animals, the people I've met – a love to be alive and living this incredible life – my inner effulgence is I think what Rajiv would call it ... so a few tears – happy ones – and now I am looking at all the stuff in my cupboard and my empty back pack ... time for Kleenex, some music, a little dancing round the room and packing up ... then on to my next port of call.