I've had another a couple of moments of realization this week – recognizing just how far I've come on my personal journey. I was skype texting with a friend and relaying my group experience here – and realized how different it would have been even a year or two ago ... I am so much more open and even loud – in a separate conversation, Barbara chuckled when I said that previously I would have been so quiet and reserved ... her direct quote I believe was “you, quiet?” Then I was walking to the store by myself at dusk and it was getting dark on the way back. I started out nervous but then realized I really was fine. Such a difference from 2 weeks ago when I walked along the road by the hotel having just flown in and really wondered what on earth I was doing here. I've come a long way :-)
While walking and reflecting, for the first time, I did wonder what my life would have been like if I had done this 20 years ago when I initially headed out to 'travel' the world. I didn't dwell on it for long at all – I believe in karma and that people's lives unfold as they are meant to – I have to. Undoubtedly my life would have been different – but honestly, doing something like this wasn't even on my radar then. And I do believe that somehow the second half of my life is going to be worth something different that it would have been if I'd never embarked on this journey. I am committed to ensuring that this life I'm somehow preparing for – not even sure what it is – will happen. It won't be easy and it will take more work but I can do it.
This experience has also reminded me just how much age is only a number. From a purely numerical perspective I can describe all the volunteers except Barbara with the 'kids' label and yet they are so much more than that. As I didn't want to be the 'mum', I hold back on organizing, instead look to contribute the same as the rest. And I'm learning a lot – those that have been here longer and know their way around as well as those as new as me – everyone has great ideas and the nice thing about working with kids is that we are all equal in our knowledge, regardless of age. And I loved to see the natural leaders emerge within the group. The 'kids' are all in their own unique ways, great people and while yes, they are in 20 ish year old bodies, it is their personalities, minds, hearts and souls that they'll take through life and that I got the chance to get to know for these few weeks. I'll be very curious to see where life takes them – they will do great things.
“The best time to plant a tree is twenty years ago. The second best time is now.”
I just found this African proverb (at the end of Dead Aid) – some how it seems right for my life right now. I continue to be so grateful for the journey I am on and I hope in some way, this was an opportunity, first or second, for all of us to plant a tree.
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...don't rule out that we are all "kids" - you included.
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